It's been a while....

I haven't posted since Jan 16th...too too long! So much has been going on in my life...especially medically....

1st.- I went to have an MRI because that was the next step in this crazy process. Well, I freaked out and lasted about 5min in that horrible little tube. I went back to see my Surgeon and she prescibed me some Xanax and I was to now have my MRI done at St. Joseph's. So last Wed I did just that. My wonderful husband took off work and drove me to the outpatient pavilion. We left at about 9am for my 11:15 appt. He took me to breakfast and we chatted for a while because we had a lot of time to kill. It was so nice to be able to eat in peace...lol! I enjoyed it very much! At about 10:30 I took my so called "happy pill" Yeah...I wasn't so happy and I was still super nervous! But, I told myself I had to do it...for me and for my family...I have to know if it's cancer. I just kept thinking of my husband...he always gives me strength! I thought about my kids....just had to really focus to stay calm and not panic. I did it! It's done.....

2nd- My Surgeons office called and wanted to see me Friday. So I was scheduled for 2pm. Up until this point I was convinced it wasn't cancer....not sure what it is but, that was my feeling....up until then. I had been planning a BIG 2nd birthday party for my 3rd child and Friday was a super busy day. I completely forgot about my appointment. i called the office at 2:05 and proceeded to tell the receptionist I couldn't make it. She said I needed to come in and anytime before 5 was fine just as long as I came....hmmm, odd...ok, I'll be there. So I get there....not having to wait too long my Dr comes in and we laugh and she asked how I was...blah blah blah.. She then starts to get very serious and proceeds to say...well, we need to discuss quite a few things.....(I'm thinking hmmm, ok) She proceeds and says...(Gonna get a little graphic) She draws on a white board my left breast. Side view and frontal view. She says I have a 2cm mass behind my left nipple (that was my original complaint) I have a 3cm mass at 3:30 and enlarged lymph nodes. Yeah, that's a lot. I wasn't expecting that....I don't think she was either. I could see the concern on her face and I knew it wasn't great news..in fact it was pretty bad. FYI- My rt breast is perfect...lol! We discussed a plan. So she decided to biopsy 2 of the masses and if they are Cancerous we will not biopsy the 3rd. If they are cancer I decided I will have a Bilateral Mastectomy with reconstruction. Which by the way....I'm gonna still do even if it's not Cancer. I thought with my strong family history and the fact that I lost my mother so young it is the best thing for me and my family. My family needs me and I need to be around for a long time.

I will have my biopsy's next week and will keep everyone up to date ;)

Take care,
Denise xoxo!