Hope

Today I had a meeting at Jackson's school and it was really interesting. They said he's doing really great and is SO smart! The one thing he continues to struggle with Social Skills. Which most children with Autism do.

I'd like to go back to when Jacks was a baby......
He was happy for the most part...normal. But I guess now looking back he really didn't make eye contact. At 8mo he was becoming less and less interested in anything. By 12mo it was apparent that something was different. He had no language, no babble, never made eye contact, never pointed, never waved and never responded to his name. We just thought...he's quiet. Maybe he couldn't hear very well or was deaf. Or just an introvert. Nothing wrong with that. We loved him! At around 13mo we found out he was tongue tied. WOW! I felt like all our questions were answered. That's it! Easy fix! That didn't fix anything. So we had him tested at 18mo and the results were that he has A Sensory Processing Disorder. We had no idea what that meant..... We wanted further testing. In this time frame he started having these HUGE tantrums. HUGE. We were unable to go anywhere with him. Everything aggravated him. It was horrible and even thinking about it now gets me choked up. At 20mo he started speech because he still was not talking. No words, no babble. We had our 1st visit. At this visit he had a tantrum....for an hour. He proceeded to kick, scream and throw things. All because I took the phone. She asked if he lined up things...Yes. Do I think he's deaf...yes. Question after question....that had nothing to do with speech. Then she tells me. I think your son has Autism and needs to be retested immediately. As soon as we left she had called my Pediatrician and I got a call the next day with an appointment. I cried....I cried hard.....all I knew about Autism was that you loose your kids. They regress and don't ever speak. I was mourning all my hopes and dreams I had for Jacks. I couldn't go anywhere without crying. I remember 1 incident clearly. I went over to my friend Erica's house and immediately ran to her bathroom and just sobbed.....I felt like I was dying....I couldn't control it. I was a hot mess. REALLY, It was a horrible time for us.

I'm happy to say that it has all changed!!! He started ABA at 2yrs old and has done amazing! He's talking and learning so much! His social skills  still need some work but we are on our way!! I don't feel hopeless anymore like I once did. He's in a great Autistic preschool and does ABA daily! I have my son back! He's corky and has to be taught social cues but he is cute and sweet! Autism has been a blessing in disguise.....I wouldn't change a thing about our families journey through this. I'm proud of who he is and I accept it ALL!